I was heading back to work today, that was my plan when I saw the APN last Thursday. My surgeon was stuck in surgery and did not see him, and she thought it would be a good time for me to return as well. Well forget that, I have not had a "poop" since last Wednesday, I am completely stopped up. Gotta love pain pills. I had to take them since my pain was awful. Now I am paying the price, the pain at my port site is awful once again because of the pressure in there I am assuming.
I am off to get a perscription of Magnesium Citrite and that should do the trick they hope. I am planning on heading back to work on Wednesday now.
All I can say is I am so ready to feel better, and be able to have enough energy to get back to the gym. I want to work out. I have not been on the scale since last Monday. I had gained 10 pounds. I am scared to weight while all this is going on, because with swelling and now impaction who knows what the scale will say. I am just trying to remain calm.
I see my internal med doc on Thursday and she is going to give me a new drug to try that will help my hunger. I am hoping that it works. I have not been hungry since surgery though. Which is good, I have not been eating much but what I have been eating has been mostly healthy. I am trying to make healthy choices and just heal. I think that is most important right now.
I know that I will not be going under the knife again anytime soon. I have no desire to feel this way again anytime soon. I feel like they went in there and just ripped my band out. I know that is NOT what happened. But this has been so different than what I imagined it would be. I figured it would be no worse than having the band implanted. I was so wrong.
I have been reading the blogs, but have not written much. I will do better. I have just not felt much like posting, or doing anything. I am glad that the weather is warming up, it is a huge incentive for me to get out of the house.
Monday, March 19, 2012
I certainly have had a crappy couple of days. I started getting this searing burning feeling about two inches to the side of my port scar on Friday and it continued all weekend. It felt like something was ripping inside of me. Fun stuff!
I am happy to report that it is subsiding finally and I believe that I have turned the corner on mending. I am looking forward to feeling better and being able to work out. Even just walking my three mile walk will be a great thing. I am so tired, and I am sleeping quite a bit.
I got a letter in the mail today from my insurance company that they denied my band removal as not medically necessary, so now the process begins to find out why and what the Surgeon has to do to show that it was I guess. All I know is that I had horrific pain and was having trouble eating and keeping things down and was vomiting after almost every meal, and I guess that was not enough for them.
I am glad that the pain in my chest has resolved and that the feeling in my throat has subsided as well. I was fearful that those things would not go away when I had the surgery. I did wait, this all began on the 8th if February and I did not have surgery til the 12th of March. The problems were getting worse they were not resolving.
I have done a lot of thinking about all of this, since it began, as to why I had to lose the band, what was it all for. I do believe that it taught me some great lessons. I have learned how to live, and it is up to me to keep doing just that. I can no longer choose to comfort myself with food and that I have to be mindful of what I put in my mouth and why I am eating.
I know that with the help of those who love me, I can get through this awful time when I never imagined I would ever find myself. Now to deal with the insurance company just adds another layer of distaste to all of this for me. The Dr was to get prior authorization for the band removal and should have so I have no idea what all of this means. Even though I deal with medical insurance on a daily basis with my job with the Medical Group I know that these denial can be appealed, I just am tired and not wanting to have to deal with this on top of losing my band. I mean really do they think that I WANTED to lose the band.
I have been reading the blogs, but have not been responding much, but I hope to get back in the swing of it soon. I have to get caught up with school first. I missed class last Tuesday night and so I have homework to do and am just now today feeling like doing it.
Friday, March 16, 2012
Yesterday was my 32nd wedding anniversary to Alan. Hard to believe all we have been through together in that amount of time.
I am healing, slowly but healing. I had a really rough few days as I could not sleep very well, and that makes for a really bad recovery. I was sick from the pain meds and so that made it hard to take them. I am allergic to almost all pain medicine so it is really hard. I am finally not in pain as I was, it is now horrible soreness.
I must admit that I never had any of this with the band placement nor with my gall bladder removal that happened a year after the band. I know I am older, but still WOW!
I mentioned to you all about the fact that I am unsure if I want another procedure and I am leaning towards that I do not. I saw the Nurse Practioner at my Dr office last Thursday before I had surgery. She and I talked for over an hour about everything. I cried, she listened. Then she said that she definitely would steer me away from any more surgery at this time. She would never suggest that I have BYPASS as she said she sees the train wrecks from this surgery. She told me that the malabsorption of Calcium alone is awful not to mention the iron deficiencies as well. She said that I have proven that I can lead a healthy life as I have been doing it, she thinks I just need help with hunger. So she wants to try a new drug that works on the hunger center of the brain. She said it is very safe and non addictive. I am willing to try it.
I have to say I am in no hurry to go back under a knife. Since they would not do revision when they took out the band, I am hesitant. So for now, I am going to not do revision.
I am going to see how I can do without it. I believe that I do know all of the right things I need to do and I that I was living the life. I never imagined when I got banded that I would be the woman who regained most of the weight she lost, nor the woman who after taking good care of her band that she would over night have a problem and lose the band. I will tell you that my pain is completely resolved in my chest. So it was my band. I have no searing burning between my breasts anymore. I have no golf ball feeling in my throat either. I am glad they are gone.
I want to work out so bad, I miss it terribly. I am going to be hitting it hard once I am healed enough to do so. I am done feeling sorry for myself. I did that for about 10 days there were I was crying and just not being very positive. I allowed all of the negativity around losing my band to scare the hell out of me. I know that the band is only 10% at most of this. I am the majority of the success. I have to follow the life and eat and exercise correctly and I will see my goal. I regained 7 pounds since being unfilled. So now, it is time to get back in the game.
I am grateful to all of you who have written and called and let me know how much support I truly have in all of you. You are all the best, and I love you.
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
I am home and recovering from surgery. I arrived at the hospital at 6am yesterday and was prepped for surgery with my surgeon. Dr. Debord is who put in my band on November 9,2007. He came to my bedside in pre-op and told me that we would get the band out, and then after I heal we could talk about another procedure. I am not certain that I want another procedure at this time. I will post more about that when I feel better.
I wanted to let you all know that I am home, but I am hurting really bad and the pain meds are making me sick. So not real great at the moment. I know it will get better.
Thank you for all of your prayers, I love you all!
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
I have my plan, even though it is not what I had hoped would have happened today. I am scheduled to have my band removed on Monday morning at 8am. No revision at this time. Dr. Marshall advised me that he was going to have Dr. Debord remove the band, since he is my surgeon. That he was no comfortable doing the revision at this time, since I am still in pain. He wants to make sure that the pain resolves before he considers revision.
I sort of feel like he went back on everything he had been talking to me about, but I in no way want someone doing surgery on me who doesn't want to either. I love Dr. Debord he will be floored to see me in the OR. The last time I saw him was on the 7th of February when all was great! The next morning all hell broke loose for my band.
Dr. Marshall did not say we would NOT do the revision he just said not right now. I am ok with that, I am holding onto something one of me beloved BOOBS posted to me on Facebook. This is not all about the BAND! I have lived banded live for nearly five years, I know how to eat, and what to eat, I also know that exercise is the KEY! So I have to focus, I will NOT gain this weight back I refuse.
I wanted to let everyone know. This is what is happening. He told me that my esophagus shows that my band was too tight and that is more than likely why all of this is happening. I have been unfilled for three weeks and still having issues. So time for removal.
I will try to stay calm and keep updating here. I hope it is not wrong for me to continue to blog in a community that is about being banded, when I will no longer have a band. I believe you all love me, no matter what!
Monday, March 5, 2012
Today is my gastric emptying study at 3:15pm. I am not eating today, just because I do not want any food causing issues with this test on my part.
I see the surgeon tomorrow at 11:45 am and hopefully we will have answers and a plan. Alan is going with me to both of these appointments. I have completely accepted the loss of my band, and am ready to move on and do a revision. The pain and uncomfortable feeling in my chest is reason enough for me. It has been a month Thursday that this nightmare began for me. Completely out of the blue, everything has been fine for the last 1,498 days since surgery, then BAM!
No explanation, no reasons and frankly they have no idea why this is happening. I have done my research. I have read and educated myself on the sleeve. I have talked to my sweet Boobs Angela and Jacquie, I feel comfortable with revision.
I never thought I would ever say this, as my band was my best friend, but I am ready for the next chapter in this journey. Staying busy trying to remain calm.
My last conversation with my surgeon on Thursday was better than the previous. He knows what I want, he is an amazing surgeon, he has been doing bariatric procedures for over 25 years. He has not done a revision from band to sleeve! He does many sleeve operations and told me it is not a difficult surgery. He did tell me that a leak with the sleeve can be worse that one with RNY. He just wants me informed , he told me he would be an awful surgeon if he did not inform me of the risks that can actually happen. I asked him if he has ever had a leak and he said merely this. Yeap once, and the patient did not come back post op to have his drain removed, he waited nearly three weeks to come back. So patient fault here in my opinion.
I know there is risk, but I am willing to follow all the rules and be a poster girl for this revision.
All for now. Please keep Angela from Repair and Renovation in your prayers as she lost her father this weekend and is having surgery this week herself.
Thursday, March 1, 2012
I saw Dr.Marshall at 11:00 and he said that he wanted to get a Nuclear Gastric Emptying Study before he proceeds with surgery. I am scheduled for this test Monday at 3:15 and I will see him on Tuesday morning at 11:45. I am praying this will be the last test and then we can proceed to get relief from this situation.
We talked to day more at length about the revision surgery. He is still dragging his feet about the sleeve, but did not say NO he would not do it. He is just concerned about the anatomy and leaks. He said leaks with the sleeve are more sever and harder to get to heal. He knows the sleeve is what I want and I think he will do it, but still am not certain what is going to happen.
I am hurting and was crying in his office, he made them schedule the test as soon as possible which is Monday. I am hopeful that once we get the results he will move forward with revision, they have to send everything to my insurance and it has to be approved by the medical director of Humana. I have spoke with Humana and they do cover this revision. I hope that they will approve it and not give us any issues.
He did tell me it is possible for him to do the revision at the same time he removed the band, if he did not have to repair anything while he was in there. If he would have to repair something from the band or if there is something that needs to heal from the band he would not, and let that heal and go back in. That is something that he will not know for certain until he was to get in there.
This is all I know, it has been a very emotional day for me and I have spent alot of it crying. I am tired of hurting.