Ok, I know I have not been the best blogger of late, but working out 6 days a week and getting ready to go back to school, has really zapped me.
I also, feel like my journey is entering a new phase. The whole theme of my journey seems to be centered around YOU CAN and taking baby steps on a path to self discovery. A path where I am learning that the only limits that I have are the ones I allow myself to be fettered with. I look back and reflect on my past and I can plainly see my self confidence and self image die a slow and painful death. When you become morbidly obese, the walls of your world close in around you slowly until your comfort zone becomes a straight jacket.
I never viewed any challenge as an opportunity for growth, it was always viewed as another opening for all the world to see my ineptness and to suffer embarrassment. That is the one thing that makes morbid obesity such a killer. We all know what it does to our health, but obesity is a destroyer of the soul. This is so much more than merely shedding pounds, it is about reclaiming my life.
This is where I feel that running and Zumba and Body Pump have brought so much healing to my life. It is far more than simply a redundant process to be endured for the sake of burning a few extra calories in the same sense that one endures the side effects of some medication for the sake of getting well. Once the desired effect is reached the routine ends.
Before, I used to just imagine what it would be like to have self confidence and passion, now I am living the dream every day.
Yes Kristin, you can.
I know longer need the permission or approval of others to finally live my life. Each time I honor a commitment to myself to exercise, when I do not feel like it, or work through a problem and see it through, something inside grows stronger and stronger. When you begin to climb the smaller mountains the bigger ones do not seem so intimidating. It takes the same skills. After awhile one rock looks just like another, except that there are more of them piled up.......I just have to climb a little longer that is all.
One thing that I have learned on this journey is that consistent effort in never unrewarded. My dreams are not so far fetched anymore. No bravado, just a deep settled confidence that tells to me to keep climbing.
What a sense of peace this has brought to my life.
NEVER EVER GIVE UP!
The skirt in this picture I have not had on in 10 years! It is a wrap around skirt with two buttons. I still think my hips look huge, but my legs are melting away.
So again I say, "NEVER EVER GIVE UP!"